It was a long drive to Vernon last weekend, and Gabe filled in his time by writing the The Book of Gnar. And Jacko did appear, clad in a leopard print wifebeater, and he spoke unto the grommet.

Let there be commandments for the Shredding of the Gnar.

These commandments shalt be:

I - When in doubt, ride it out.

II - Loose trucks save lives.

III - Thou must sort thine shit out.

IV - Thou shalt get 'er done.

V - When being a bitch, thou must acquire a bag of concrete.

VI - Thou must then mix such concrete into a beverage, and promptly harden the fuck up.

VII - Thou must not purchase any item from Boardshoppe, but instead go to Hopkin Skate for all your shredding needs

VIII - Thou must ride otangs at all times

IX - Thou must NOT lie down on thine wheely board

X - Thou must 'surf yon tang'

XI - Thou must not be a shitte dick, but instead a sick c#nt